It means to be mindful and intentional as a mum. It means focusing on the holistic development of our child's physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. But in all the discussion we hear about Conscious Parenting, there is transformative force that is often overlooked – energy healing.
I believe energy healing plays a vital role in conscious parenting, and a little knowledge in this area can have a profound impact on both parents and children.
Understanding Energy Healing
At its core, energy healing recognizes the human body not merely as a physical entity but as a complex system of energy. Modalities like Bio Energy, Acupuncture, and Dowsing operate on the belief that imbalances or blockages in our energy fields can manifest as physical, emotional, or spiritual issues.
In my experience many of the imbalances in our energy system are caused by trauma in pregnancy or birth. For me this means, to ask a Mum who is out of energetic alignment to be mindful and intentional in her parenting, is like asking a someone with a broken leg to walk. And even if a Mum is in balance, and is willing, the parenting of a child who is out of energetic balance, is incredibly challenging.
Emotional Healing
One of the greatest gifts of parenting is that it will bring to the surface the parts of ourselves that are ready to be healed. This is marvelous if you’re conscious and choosing the healing path. If you are not, it can feel like torture.
Emotions are energy in motion. Energy Healing can clear emotional blockages empowering us to respond to our child's needs with patience and understanding, creating a stable and nurturing environment.
Stress Reduction:
In the pursuit of conscious parenting, where being present is paramount, energy healing practices like meditation, yoga and tapping become invaluable. They significantly reduce parental stress, enabling a calm and composed approach to challenges. From an energetic perspective they create space (something we’re all craving). When we have space, our energy flows. When our energy flows we can see the wider perspective, access our inner guidance and hold ourselves and our children in compassion.
Bonding and Connection:
Separation anxiety on the one hand and clash of personalities on the other, are both symptoms of ‘energetic entanglement’. With energy healing we reclaim each persons (Mother and child) energy system for themselves and the effect can be life changing. This reclaimed energy enables parents to respond with presence and patience. When a child’s energy is reclaimed they have access to all resources within…and so need less from you.
Empathy and Intuition:
What do you think when you think of the words ‘in tune’. In harmony perhaps? In balance? Living in tune means tapping into our own intuitive abilities and indeed fostering this ability in our children. Energy Healing connects with our inner guidance. This heightened awareness enables us to respond with greater sensitivity, strengthening the parent-child connection.
If you’d like to learn more about the role of energy healing and parenting I invite you to join me for a FREE MASTERCLASS online on February 29th 2024
Click here to learn more
]]>These are some examples of the thoughts that went through my head on a daily basis in the early years of my Motherhood journey.
They felt very true to me, and the evidence was clear, as I compared myself to all my mum friends. I obviously wasn’t cut out for Motherhood.
I look back on my younger self now and I think God she was great. So capable, So wise. So strong. So good.
So why did I speak to myself so cruelly?
Well I now understand that Motherhood and it’s challenges has a beautiful way of unmasking our core beliefs. Core beliefs are deeply rooted convictions that significantly influence our perceptions, behaviours, and our experience of life
Understanding Core Beliefs:
Core beliefs are the foundational assumptions we hold about ourselves, the world, and others. These deeply ingrained convictions shape our thoughts, emotions, and actions, serving as the lenses through which we interpret the world. Formed early in life, influenced by our upbringing and experiences, these beliefs become integral to our identity.
For example if as a child you were regularly told to be quiet, you may hold the core belief that your opinion doesn’t matter. This may influence your ability to be assertive, even with your own children
If as a child you were shamed for being ‘lazy’ you may feel shame as an adult when you are attempting to tackle the never ending household chores we have as Mums
If as a child you felt you had no control in your life, as an adult when your own child refuses to do what they are asked , this old belief is triggered again. I am helpless, I have no control
If you were a good girl. If you did everything to secure your parents’ attention and affection, but were still ignored, you may have a core belief I’m not good enough. This now is easily triggered in Motherhood because of the unrealistic standards we set for ourselves
Anyway you get the gist!
Now these core beliefs can have a massive impact on how we experience life!
Imagine if you wore dark glasses all day everyday. You would quite rightly believe the world to be a dark place, especially if you had forgotten that you have the choice to take them off! When you finally remove the lenses you've been looking through, the world can seem like a very different place. But the reality is.... the world didn't change, your perception did
When we remove the core beliefs that colour our perception, we can experience motherhood and life in a very different way.
So what can we do with the this information?
Well the good news is that every time you become aware of a core belief you have an opportunity to change it
And the more core beliefs we uncover, the more peaceful we feel within.
This is the healing journey of an Aligned Mama!
We have the power to change our core beliefs.
We also have the power to help foster positive core beliefs in our children
How to change a Core Belief
While core beliefs are deeply ingrained, they are not fixed. Recognizing and challenging negative core beliefs is a transformative step towards shaping a positive motherhood experience. Self-awareness is crucial; understanding our triggers and being mindful of automatic responses allows us to interrupt the cycle of passing on potentially harmful beliefs to our children.
Step 1 . Identify a core belief that is showing itself in your life. Click here to access Free Journal Prompts to help you identify the core beliefs that are holding you back.
Step 2: Choose a new belief and search for evidence to support this belief every single day.
Eg. If your journaling uncovered a limiting belief 'I am lazy'. Every time you do something that is clearly not lazy, take note! Awareness is your super power here.
Fostering Positive Core Beliefs
Aligned motherhood involves fostering constructive core beliefs in ourselves and our children. By cultivating self-compassion, promoting a growth mindset, and encouraging resilience, we can create an environment that nurtures confident, emotionally intelligent individuals.
Don't underestimate the power of doing this inner work. It is the path to a more peaceful and rewarding Motherhood experience.
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This blog is dedicated to overwhelmed mothers who may not realize that their own behaviours and patterns are contributing to their feelings of enslavement. As a recovering ‘overwhelmed Mother’ I can look back now and see how I put so much pressure on myself when my girls were small. My approach with my third child is so different because I have quite simply let go many of the 'shoulds'! I have chosen a easier, more enjoyable path
Is it time to recognize the shackles you've unknowingly placed on yourself and explore the possibilities of choosing a more liberated and fulfilling life? Where to begin!
Awareness is Everything!
The Unexamined Patterns
Motherhood often comes with a set of unwritten rules and expectations. Many of the activities and responsibilities we take on are influenced by what our own mothers did, societal norms, and the actions of our peers. These external influences can shape our behaviour and leave us feeling trapped in a cycle of obligations. The first step toward change is recognizing these patterns. Take some time to reflect on your daily routines and responsibilities. Are you doing things because you genuinely want to, or are you following a script that society has written for you?
Acknowledging Self-Imposed Shackles
It's essential to understand that, in many cases, we are responsible for the mental and physical load we carry as mothers. It happens in the early years of motherhood when we are most likely to know feeding times, sleeping times, pooping times! We might not realize it, but we've put on our own shackles by adhering to expectations and standards that don't align with our values or desires. The weight we carry is often the result of choices we've made, consciously or unconsciously. Accepting this truth is the first step toward liberation.
The Power of Choice
Motherhood doesn't mean forfeiting your freedom. We have more agency in shaping our experiences than we often believe. Recognize that you have choices, and you can choose a different path. You can choose to prioritize self-care, set boundaries, and make decisions that align with your true self rather than societal pressures. Embrace the idea that your life can be as free and fulfilling as you desire it to be.
Questioning "Shoulds" and Expectations
The pressure to conform to what society, your family, or your friends expect from a mother can be overwhelming. But what if you asked yourself, "If no one was judging me, would I be bothered by this?" Many times, the answer will be no. By challenging these "shoulds" and expectations, you can free yourself from unnecessary burdens and make choices that resonate with your authentic self.
Embracing Small Changes
Real change often begins with small, incremental steps. What small changes could you introduce into your daily life to make motherhood feel less overwhelming? It might involve setting boundaries, seeking help when needed, or simply allowing yourself to let go of tasks that don't bring you joy ( I haven’t ironed for years!) Remember, nothing changes if nothing changes, and sometimes the smallest adjustments can lead to profound transformations.
Motherhood should be a journey of love, growth, and fulfilment, not a path burdened by self-imposed expectations and societal pressures. We as Mums needs to reclaim our freedom, honour our choices, and create a motherhood that aligns with our true selves. Remember, "Nothing changes if nothing changes." Start making those small changes today, and watch as your life transforms into one that feels easier, more joyful, and in alignment with who you truly are. You have the power to choose your own path, and with that choice, you can create a motherhood experience that is both fulfilling and liberating.
If you would like support in creating change in your Motherhood experience, the Aligned Mama Membership is the place for you. You can click here to learn more about the membership!
]]>I know I’m not the only Mum who has experienced this. Many mothers can struggle with a deep sense of rage that can be overwhelming and puzzling. However, when we explore the emotions underlying this rage, we uncover a profound truth: Mother rage is often a symptom of unmet needs and unaddressed wounds.
Under the rage there are the hidden layers- feelings of isolation, invisibility, powerlessness, disconnection, and lack of support. In addition this rage can be rooted in the pain carried by generations of oppressed women, leading to the concept known as the "Mother Wound." By embarking on a journey of self-healing and empowerment, we mums not only transform our own lives but also contribute to the healing of our ancestors and future generations.
Unveiling the Emotions
Everyone is different of course but when I look back to my early years of Motherhood these are the emotions that stand out for me. I invite you read them slowly and see if they resonate with you too.
Feeling Isolated: Motherhood can be an isolating experience, as the demands of caring for a child often leave little time for socializing or nurturing personal connections. The sense of being emotionally detached from others can intensify feelings of frustration and anger.
Feeling Unseen: Mothers often pour their hearts and souls into their role, yet their efforts may go unnoticed or unappreciated. The feeling of being unseen can lead to resentment and anger, as the immense dedication and sacrifices made for their family remain unrecognized.
Feeling Unheard: Mothers may struggle with a sense of not being heard or understood. Their opinions, concerns, and needs might be dismissed or disregarded, creating a deep well of frustration and anger within them.
Feeling Powerless: The demands and responsibilities of motherhood can sometimes leave mothers feeling overwhelmed and powerless. The lack of control over their own lives can fuel rage, as they yearn for a sense of agency and autonomy.
Feeling Disconnected: In our fast-paced world, mothers can experience a disconnection from their own sense of identity and purpose. Losing touch with their own desires and passions can give rise to a deep-seated anger that stems from the loss of self.
Feeling Unsupported: The absence of a supportive network or inadequate support systems can leave mothers feeling overwhelmed and alone. The lack of assistance in shouldering the responsibilities of motherhood can contribute to feelings of anger and resentment.
The Mother Wound
It was years later that I learned about the Mother Wound. This concept recognizes that the pain experienced by mothers today is not solely our own but also echoes the pain of generations of oppressed women. Centuries of gender inequalities, societal expectations, and limited opportunities have left an indelible mark on the collective consciousness of women. This ancestral pain can be passed down through generations, often surfacing as unexplained anger and rage within us.
The Path to Healing
Healing the Mother's Wound begins with recognizing and acknowledging the underlying emotions and wounds. By embarking on a journey of self-healing and empowerment, mothers can transform their lives and contribute to the healing of their ancestors and of their daughters. But where do we start?
Put Yourself First: We Mums are not very good at this but it is so important that we prioritize our own well-being and self-care. Take the time to identify and address your needs, whether it be through energy therapy, counselling, self-reflection, or engaging in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment.
Listen: Practice active self-listening and validate your emotions. Give yourself permission to express your feelings and seek support when necessary.
Witness Your Pain: Engage in introspection and explore the deeper layers of your rage. Allow yourself to process and release the pain that may have been carried through generations. Hold yourself in Self compassion as you do this.
Empower Yourself: Reclaim your sense of power and agency. Take steps to assert your needs, set boundaries, and make choices that align with your authentic self.
Follow Your Guidance: Trust your intuition and inner wisdom. Seek guidance from mentors, role models, or spiritual practices that resonate with you, helping you navigate your journey of healing and self-discovery.
Support Yourself: Cultivate a support system that understands and acknowledges your experiences. Connect with other mothers who are on a similar path, forming a community where you can share, learn, and grow together.
I believe that by healing ourselves, we mums become agents of healing, not only for our own lives but also for the past and future generations of women. As part of this transformative journey, we contribute to restoring balance and nurturing a world where mothers and their needs are truly seen, heard, and supported.
How cool is that!
The Aligned Mama Membership doors are now open. The memberships offers opportunity for healing, for empowerment and for connection with other mums on the same path. You don’t have to do this alone.
Click here to learn more about the Aligned Mama Membership
]]>I am so pleased that in recent times they have opened up to it again. When they are struggling, they don’t want my advice, but when they lay down on my treatment bed I can offer them something much better……access to their own inner wisdom.
We know that navigating adolescence can be a challenging time for teenagers. Amidst the pressures of academics, relationships, and societal expectations, they are required to make decisions with no mammy holding their hand.
It is so important that we allow children to make decisions when they are young so that when they reach this stage they can tune in and know what feels right for them. Like any of us, if they are out of alignment this can be hard.
That’s where Energy Healing can help. If you as Mum have a basic understanding of energy and energy healing, you can support your teenagers in accessing and honouring their inner wisdom.
Understanding Energy Healing
At its core, energy healing acknowledges the existence of an energetic system within the body and aims to balance and harmonize the flow of energy. It recognizes that energy imbalances or blockages can lead to physical, emotional, and mental disharmony. There are many healing modalities out there. Most people are now familiar with reflexology, acupuncture, yoga, reiki and breathwork. I practice and teach bio energy and pendulum healing.
In my experience when our energy is blocked we cannot hear the voice within and we search for answers outside of ourselves. I think particularly in these times, with social media and access to all sorts of 'advice', it's more important than ever that teenagers know themselves well, and know how to follow their intuition.
How can Energy Healing help
Creating Calm: Energy healing techniques can help teenagers cultivate a sense of calm and inner peace. By quieting the mind and releasing stress, they can create space to connect with their intuition and inner wisdom.
Balancing and Clearing Energy: Energy healing aims to restore to balance the energy system. By removing energetic blockages and promoting the free flow of energy, teenagers can experience increased clarity, focus, and intuition.
Releasing Stored Emotions: Adolescence is a time of emotional growth and exploration. Energy healing can assist teenagers in identifying and releasing any emotional wounds or traumas that may be obstructing their ability to hear their inner guidance. By addressing and resolving emotional blockages, they can move forward with greater clarity and alignment.
Enhancing Self-Awareness: Energy healing practices encourage teenagers to develop a deeper understanding of themselves. Through self-reflection, introspection, and guided exploration, they can uncover their passions, values, and authentic desires. This heightened self-awareness enables them to make choices aligned with their inner guidance.
Strengthening Intuition: Energy healing supports the development and trust of intuition. By consistently engaging in energy healing practices, teenagers can learn to discern between their intuition and external influences. As they strengthen their intuitive abilities, they become more adept at following their inner guidance.
Cultivating Mind-Body Connection: Energy healing recognizes the intricate connection between the mind and body. Techniques like yoga, tai chi, or qi gong can help teenagers develop a deeper awareness of their physical sensations and emotional states. This mind-body connection facilitates a more integrated approach to decision-making and living in alignment with one's inner guidance.
In a world filled with distractions and external pressures, energy healing offers teenagers a pathway to reconnect with their inner guidance.
Of course it is my dream, that energy healing will be a normal part of home life in every family. It offers parents and way to support their children all through the journey. Our children will not carry with them the baggage of their childhood. They will grow up empowered adults aware of their alignment and with tools to support themselves.
No matter where you are on your motherhood journey it’s never too late to introduce energy healing to your family.
The Aligned Mama Membership offer Mums a comprehensive energy healing training course, all recorded in short 10 minute videos. If you feel drawn to empowering yourself in this way click here to learn more
]]>One day in 2011 I learned that the reason I was tired all the time, the reason I was angry all the time, the reason everyday tasks felt overwhelming, the reason I wasn’t enjoying being a Mum............. was because of a disruption to my energy system, caused, in my case, by trauma on the day of my first child’s birth.
Many of us experience physical and emotional turbulence on the way to motherhood. For some there is trauma on the road to conception, for others a difficult pregnancy, and sadly for many, trauma during the birth (you can read more about the effects of birth shock here)
Physical and emotional shock can disrupt our energy flow. This leaves us feeling very tired, unable to think clearly, unable to process emotions and feeling like everything is hard. For some there is an energetic imbalance between mother and child, that can leave them either over reliant on each other, or clashing with each other.
Conversely when balance is restored to the energy system of both mother and child, you suddenly have the energy to approach the million tasks that motherhood requires. You have the clarity to decide what’s important. Relationships come into balance and you start to enjoy, instead of endure, your Motherhood experience.
(If you feel you need energy healing please click here to learn about the Mother & Child Sessions I offer)
Matrescence refers to the developmental phase of new motherhood. Much like adolescence — it’s a stage when hormones surge, bodies change, and identity and relationships shift. Awareness can bring acceptance of these changes instead of feeling like something has gone wrong. It hasn’t.
It’s so important to understand this, as it explains so much of the ups & downs we experience in motherhood. How lovely would it be if we were prepared for this stage of our lives.
The ideal is to give ourselves the time and compassion, to adjust to our new role. Putting in place supports to ensure our own self-care isn’t neglected during this crucial time, is the best gift we can give ourselves and our children.
When we become a mother we are already playing by a set of rules that we're not even aware of, that we've internalised and adopted and that are being reinforced by the people around us.' Dr Sophie Brock
We all want to be the perfect mother but who exactly is she?
Some of us try to emulate our own mothers. Some of us are haunted by the mums of Instagram. Some of us try to keep up with the seemingly perfect mum in the friend group. But the reality is it is impossible to do all the ‘shoulds’ that society has thrown our way....... and it’s also not necessary!
It takes time to grow in confidence as a Mum. When we become clear on our own values and stop comparing ourselves to others, it becomes so much easier.
Here is a really useful journaling exercise to identify our own limiting beliefs and gain clarity on what’s really important to you as a mum: Journal Prompts
When we first become Mums we often introduce habits, which may make sense at the time, but eventually lead us to become hostages of our own choices.
For many of us this includes, neglecting our own basic needs (sleep, food, water), taking on full responsibility for all baby related decisions, and taking on the bulk of the load when it comes to housekeeping. Can you relate?
This becomes harder to maintain when we have more children and as our children get older, and perhaps some of us go back to work....... but continue to carry the load.
This can lead not only to burnout but to resentment and sadly discord in relationships.
We forget we have a choice. We forget we can change theses habits. This requires massive responsibility as we acknowledge we created our own prison and it is up to us the tear down those walls.
Journal Prompt
Where in my life do I feel imprisoned?
If I knew how to take the shackles off what would I do?
For many Mums the helplessness we feel when our children are unwell or unhappy can been a massive contributor to our overwhelm.
I recall in the early years of motherhood bringing my children to the doctor for everything from constipation and eczema to biting and night terrors… and I never felt any of it helped. I just had to watch my child suffer
Learning about Energy Healing and Essential Oils completely eradicated that fear. I learned that there is a natural solution for everything and I loved I that I could provide it for my child.
This of course was my motivation when I started teaching workshops in Energy and Oils because I truly feel every mum will benefit from knowing this.
And from this desire to empower other Mums, the Aligned Mama Membership was born .
This time last year I visited a Buddhist Retreat Centre, Dzogchen Beara, in beautiful West Cork and I attended a Self-Compassion Retreat. I was guided and supported in holding my own heart. It was beautiful and moving and for me life changing. Here I would like to share with you a little of what I learned
What is Self-Compassion?
On this retreat we looked at self-compassion and explored what it meant, and what it looked like. I found it easier to say what self-compassion is not. When I thought of pushing myself, criticizing myself, judging myself….I knew this is NOT self-compassion.
So self-compassion must be the opposite I decided.. It must be supporting myself, encouraging myself and accepting myself. I have to say I liked the sound of that!
In Buddhism they refer to compassion as ‘the wish for others to be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.’ So really with self-compassion we might ask 'What can I do to alleviate my own suffering? How can I support myself, encourage myself and accept myself more?' (You may wish to journal on that!)
Self-Compassion for Mums
Self-compassion is essentially about meeting ourselves in the places where we feel unmet. As mothers we often feel unseen, unsupported, undervalued. We feel burdened by the pressure to be all things to everyone....but who is cracking the whip?
If you're ready to put that whip down, and introduce more self compassion into your life, you'll see amazing things happen. With a self-compassion practice we start to actively look for ways to see, support and value ourselves.
How to practice Self-Compassion.
Kristen Neff is an American Psychologist who has studied self-compassion and it’s effect on our happiness & wellbeing. She speaks of 3 elements to self-compassion :
The first is an awareness of how we feel. Many of us are so busy on the threadmill of life that we don’t take the time to check in with ourselves and we don’t actually know how we are…really. You may like to do that right now, as you read this blog. Just pause, breathe, put your hand on your chest and ask yourself 'How am I? How am I really?'
You may find when you pause like that, that you're feeling tired, or achy, maybe thirsty or hungry even. You may notice you feel stressed or anxious or sad. In life we tend to keep ourselves busy to avoid feeling the 'difficult emotions' but seeing how you are, is step 1 creating a more peaceful life
The second element she refers to as ‘Common Humanity’. This is the idea that everyone is suffering in one way or another, it’s part of life. Therefore there’s actually nothing going wrong, if we are having a hard time
In fact our stress often comes from the thought “I shouldn’t be feeling this way…….’ Really what she’s saying is, we need to be ok with feeling our difficult emotions.
So as you notice how you feel right now, you could say to yourself 'I see you're feeling ______and that's ok'
The third element Neff refers to is kindness. Being as kind to ourselves as we would a friend who was struggling.
Can you remember a time when a friend (or your child) came to you in distress. How did you speak to them? What was your tone of voice like?
Now consider a time when you were in distress. How did you speak to yourself? What was your tone of voice. I'm willing to bet it was a little more harsh and intolerant than your response to your friend!
How do I know this? Well because we all have a critical voice that likes to tell us we're stupid, or lazy or just not enough. It's designed either to motivate us or to keep us safe
But we all respond better to kindness and encouragement, and the good news is that just as we all have a critical voice, we all have a compassionate voice too. She's just a little quieter. She is your number 1 cheerleader! She adores you and everything about you! She knows everything about you and she still loves you! Imagine that! If you could hear her voice now, what do you think she might say? (Something to journal on perhaps)
If you'd like to introduce more Self-Compassion into your life, I invite you to join me on Sunday 19th March @11.30am for a Soothing Session for Self-Compassion. This is an online group Energy Healing session.
This event is free. Click here to register and receive your zoom link
I hope to see you there x
]]>What is Shame?: Shame encompasses a whole family of emotions including embarrassment, guilt, self-consciousness, humiliation….indeed all those times we felt bad about our selves
Socialization: Much of the shame in our bodies comes from our experiences during the first 7 years of life, when we were learning how we needed to be in order to be accepted in the world. Humans are tribal animals. Our primal brain knows we need to be accepted, especially by our mothers, in order to survive. We learn what we need to say, do, who we need to be…. in order to avoid rejection or abandonment.
So maybe you’re naturally outgoing but your Mum kept telling you to shush – you learned to be ashamed of your loudness. If relaxing or chilling out wasn’t the done thing, you learned to see it as laziness and feel ashamed every time you put your feet up . You may even have decided that you are unworthy of love unless you are productive.
Sometimes we may have been explicitly shamed – “look at the filth or your room – shame on you” or maybe we shamed ourselves when we were been taught something new. We felt stupid because we didn’t know it and maybe we decided I’m not good enough
And if we felt rejected (possibly just because Mum or Dad are preoccupied), maybe we decided we are unlovable
And as we move through life we gather the evidence that these limiting beliefs are true, every time we are embarrassed, feel guilt, feel exposed or humiliated we reinforce the false belief that we are not good enough, not worthy or not lovable.
Thorns: Michael A. Singer, author of The Untethered Soul, refers to these buried emotions and beliefs as samskara or thorns. If you’ve ever had a thorn in your finger you’ll know it doesn’t really hurt unless you touch it. That’s where triggers come in
Triggers: You’ve heard of being triggered, but what exactly does that mean? It means that someone touched your thorn. If you even think of what a trigger on a gun is. The weapon is loaded. When the trigger is pulled the ammunition comes out. We are loaded with thorns and when they are touched they want to come out……….
Parenting provides a wonderful gift as it allows us to be triggered every day. Why is that a good thing? Well this is an opportunity to release any trapped emotions or beliefs that no longer serve us……..provided we’re open to the idea
Mother Rage: I think when we experience what they call ‘mother rage’ in many instances shame is in fact the underlying emotion. One way or another the child’s behaviour is reminding us that we are inadequate or falling short of the requirements needed to be accepted in our tribe, i.e. unrealistic perfect parent standards
Shining a light on Shame. Usually if a feeling of shame is triggered in us we avoid at all costs. It’s quite yucky. Think of any time you felt embarrassed or humiliated. We’d do anything to get away from the feeling. We distract ourselves, talk ourselves out of it, eat, drink whatever. But what if we decided to shine a light on it instead?
Self love BlocksBrené Browne tells us there are 3 essential pillars to a full happy life. One is creativity, one is rest and the other is play. When it comes to creativity, rest and play how many of us prioritise these things in our lives.? Brené points out that it is shame and limiting beliefs that prevent us really loving ourselves and prioritising self-love.
Comparison, she says kills creativity. The minute we start worrying what other people think we shrink down and hide. And rest & play are very much tied into our self-worth and what other people will think (the need to be productive all the time!)
Self Love Affirmations as Triggers
If you want to know what your limiting beliefs around self-love are, try saying out loud some self-love affirmations
I am worthy, I am enough, I deeply and completely love and accept myself
Do you notice a sensation in your body? If it doesn’t feel like the truth you’ll feel an opposing vibration
And this your opportunity to release it – if you’re feeling it, it has come to the surface
Releasing Shame
Kyle Cease, the American spiritual teacher, uses two analogies that I really like and that I think can be really helpful for releasing shame
The first is the image of a haunted train ride. As you move through a dark tunnel you may see hundred or bats coming straight for you and you scream but as you reach the bats, you go right through them, and discover they were an illusion. Much like that as we look at our shame we feel really gucky and maybe afraid. Our instinct will be to run the other way (distract ourselves) but if we can go through the guckiness we’ll see it as false
The second image I love is the idea of seeing these thorns as ice cubes bobbing to the surface. As we sit with, observe, feel into the shame, we are in fact shining a loving light on it, and much like the sun on an ice cube, the ice cube starts to melt and gently re-join the loving energy of the Universe.
If you feel you would like to release shame and any limiting beliefs around self love, you may find this recorded Soothing Session helpful. You will be guided through journaling, tapping, meditation and energy healing.
Click here to purchase Soothing Session Recording
]]>I think that’s the best word to describe how I felt in the early years of Motherhood. I felt like I had taken a job that I was not qualified to do. Like I had signed a contract, so I showed up every day and tried my best. And every day I felt inadequate. Every day I felt like I was failing.
Oh I bought the books and followed the parenting experts. I understood the concept of gentle parenting and would have loved to implement it. I recognized the need for self care. But in reality these approaches felt too difficult to apply and I was left feeling inadequate once again
If this resonates with you here’s what I want you to know
I now can see that the reason I felt inadequate is because I was parenting without accessing all the resources available to me. It was like trying to cook a dinner with one hand tied behind your back. You’d get there in the end but it was much harder than it needed to be
I want to share with you the steps I went through really helped me move into a place of confidence and joy in my motherhood journey
STEP 1: HEALING
Of course this is a work in progress but receiving Energy Healing had a massive impact on my life. Firstly I had much more energy and what a difference that made. I also learned to hear and trust my inner guidance and I stopped looking to other to tell what was right for my family. With this my confidence grew. Finally I started to see my life from a wider perspective…a soul perspective, which makes it easier to not take everything so seriously!
For me Birth Trauma had caused a disruption to my energy flow and that of my first child. This set me up for a difficult path. Clearing this had such a profound effect on me that I now offer the same treatment in my clinic . You can read more about the Mother & Child Sessions I offer here
STEP 2: LEARNING
Learning about Energy Healing was incredibly empowering. I learned how to look after my own vibration first so the I could stay firing on all cylinders. I then came to see my children as energetic beings too, and I learned how to help them stay in alignment.
A child in alignment sleeps better, eats better, behaves better, learns better…….and all of this eliminates much of the pressure of parenting. It also took away the fear that used to come when my children were ill with the normal childhood illnesses. It was so empowering to be able help them without need for doctors or medicine. If you like the idea of using energy healing in your home I think you will love the Aligned Mama Membership. You can learn more here
STEP 3: COMMUNITY
I think it’s lovely to connect with other Mums. It’s comforting to know that we are not alone in our challenges. However I found that once I had started on my healing journey, being in the company of Mums who constantly gave out about motherhood and their children, was incredibly draining for me.
I know Motherhood can be challenging but I also believe we can set ourselves up for an easier life. I believe that once we have access to our energy, access to our inner guidance and a knowledge of empowering tools to support ourselves and our children, Motherhood can be a totally different experience
If you are finding Motherhood a struggle and you are open to a different way, you may like to connect with the Mums inside the Aligned Mama Membership. We have online meetups every month, and in person gatherings every three months. You can learn more here
]]>At that time, I had just returned to full time work as a Primary School Teacher, following maternity leave. I found it really difficult going back. I had just had the happiest year of my life, at home with my little boy, and I didn’t want our cosy set up to end.
But I had to…..didn’t I?
I mean I would have liked to work as an Energy Therapist in the evenings and had my days at home with my children…….but it wasn’t the right time. We didn’t have money in the bank. It would be irresponsible to give up a permanent pensionable job….wouldn’t it?? What if I didn't get clients? What if I became ill and couldn't work?
The Universe Has Your Back offered me a whole new perspective. As soon as I had listened to the Audio book I ordered a hard copy, and as soon as it arrived, I devoured it and journaled on all the teachings.
Two weeks later I handed in my notice and I haven't looked back since
Here’s what I learned in a nutshell
I have continued with this approach and it has brought me great joy and peace knowing that the Universe has my back! If you are at a turning point in your life I definitely recommend reading this book. In the meantime here are some journal prompts to get you in the right frame of mind!
Journal Prompts
Can you think of times in your life where the Universe guided you?
Can you think of times in your life where obstacles which seemed awful at the time, actually guided you in the right direction?
What does it feel like when you place your trust in the Universe?
What would you do if you weren’t afraid?
What fearful thoughts have been running in your head about this desire?
If everything went right…what would it look like/feel like?
Lean toward Love and you will be Led
Prayer: Help me Universe to look at this situation through the eyes of Love
]]>Over the years I’ve seen more and more people talking about how hard Motherhood can be. If fact it seems to offer huge relief to mums to be in online communities where they can compare how little sleep they got or the number of bugs their child has picked up un creche.
That got me thinking. I fully accept that motherhood is a massive life change, that it involves huge personal growth and it will always be busy……….. but does it have to be hard?
I have reflected on why I found Motherhood so difficult in those early years
So what changed?
We all have different situations. You may have the added pressure of financial worry, marital breakdown, ill health or supporting a child with special needs.
So I speak only for myself when I say, while I may have hard days for the most part yes I believe Motherhood can be easy……….. when I set myself up for success.
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As a mum living in alignment, you parent in an energy of trust. You understand the natural ebbs and flows, and you honour and feel your emotion. When you experience difficult emotions, you allow yourself to fully feel and express them so you can set them free. When your children experience difficult emotions, you allow them to fully feel and express them. You take nothing personally.
As an aligned mum, you’re tapped into your unique wisdom. You have clarity and confidence You recognise your children as multi dimensional beings and trust that they have access to their own unique wisdom also. You view your parenting experience from a wider perspective and therefore you don’t sweat the small stuff
When you’re in energetic alignment, you protect and channel your energy in a way that allows you to honour yourself and choose feeling good above all else. You recognise that you attract into your experience, a life that matches your vibration so awareness of your vibration is crucial.
You’re aware that your thoughts have a huge impacts on your vibration so you choose to focus on what could possible go right instead of worrying about what could possibly go wrong. In doing this you embody the high-vibration energy and positive emotion needed to bring positive creations to life. In modelling this your children do the same.
You let go of everything that you were told you should be. You don’t pretend nor try to be happy. You understand that true happiness is so much more than a mindset, it’s a state of harmony & balance that’s felt from the depth of your soul. You’re happy because you’re authentically yourself and exerting your energy towards those things that make you light up and feel whole.
Your heart, mind, body, and spirit energy are all working together, This is what we call living in flow, living in alignment.
How to Access Energetic Alignment
Step 1 : Tuning in into our Multi-Dimensional Selves
Mindfulness, meditation, prayer and yoga are some of the ways we can begin to tune into our multi-dimensional selves. When we can become the witness of our thoughts & emotions we align with the part of us that is not involved the drama of life. Consider: who is doing the witnessing?
Step 2: Witnessing our Pain
Human habits often lead us to ignore and distract ourselves from our pain. But it is only through witnessing our pain we can be free from it. Once again as we step into the role of witness we realise that we are not our pain. We are not our thoughts. We are not our emotions. Who are we? We are then witness
Mindfulness and meditation help us step into the role of witness. Emotional Freedom Technique (Tapping) is a powerful technique that cam help us witness and then release physical & emotional pain. Journaling too can help us witness and release.
Step 3: Expanding Our Perception
Awareness is everything. Learning to witness without judgement is empowering. Listening to inspiring teachers can offer not only mindset shifts, but energetic shifts, that lead to a whole new way of viewing our lives. Being open to learning and open to changing is a powerful vibration to be in. Magic can happen!
Step 4: Releasing our Blockages
We all have energetic blockages, many of them accumulated since childhood. Bio Energy Healing, pendulum healing, EFT (Tapping) and essential oils are tools ad techniques we can use to release those blockages for ourselves and for our children. When we clear our blockages it is so much easier to make the choices necessary to keep our energy flowing and our vibration aligned.
Step 5: Connecting with our Intuitive Wisdom
There is a stream of wisdom flowing through us all the time. Mindfulness, meditation, journaling, creative arts, music, poetry are all ways in which we can connect. Our intuition is like an internal sat nav. It guides through love not fear and as mums learning to trust our inner guidance is a game changer. It cuts out all the noise about what we ‘should’ be doing.
If you’re looking for an opportunity to tune into your multi-dimensional self, learn to witness and heal your pain, expand your perception, release your blockages and connect with your intuitive wisdom I invite you to join the Aligned Mama Membership Click here to learn more
]]>Truth #1 Your birth experience matters
I remember with my first and second babies, my attitude to birth was “It’s just something horrible I have to go through to get my baby. It’ll be over in 24 hours”. I did not consider the long term effects on me or my baby.
I want you to know that your birth experience does matter. You and your baby are the only ones who are going to live with the consequences. Click here to read my blog about the affect of birth shock on mother & baby
Truth #2 Giving Birth is a normal, natural, physiological process
I saw birth as a medical procedure. I actually thought it had very little to do with me- I just had to show up and let the medical staff do their thing. I completely abdicated any responsibility.
I didn’t consider how birth is a physiological process like breathing or digesting. I never realised that we are perfectly designed to give birth without intervention.
The miracle of childbirth truly went over my head.
But when you consider how the female body grows and nourishes an unborn human, releases hormones that prepare you for birth, initiates labour, birth your baby, and then starts the healing process, and creates nourishment for your new baby through breastmilk, all on its own………it’s a wonder we’re not in total awe of the incredible miracle that we are part of!
We were meant to give birth to our children, and you can trust your body to do it the way it was designed to.
Truth #3 You can have a beautiful, transformative, peaceful, and calm birth experience
The other day I watched a children’s movie with my 5 year old. It was released in 2022 and yet the birth scene in the movie was one of screaming agony. When we’re told repeatedly that this is ‘normal’, it can be hard to accept that there is a better way.
But this is not normal and not necessary.
An empowered birth doesn’t always have to mean a natural, homebirth. You can have an empowered hospital birth, with drugs or surgery.
Indeed with my third pregnancy I had planned a gentle waterbirth at home. I had even met my midwives! But when my baby was diagnosed with a congenital heart block my plans changed.
I had a beautiful gentle c-section instead. I asked to meet the medical staff who would be involved. I asked to be told at all times what was happening. I asked to see my baby being born and to hold my baby straight away. And even though my baby had to be taken to the children’s hospital soon after birth, I got to breastfeed before he left. All because I asked. I felt safe and calm at all times
Wherever you are you can take charge of your birthing environment. With dimmed lights, calm music and your favourite essential oils you can create an experience that helps you to feel safe, secure, and calm. With knowledge of medical interventions you can choose what to do, instead being told what to do. This will have a massive impact on your birth story afterwards.
For example saying “I chose to be induced” feels much more empowered than saying “I had to be induced”.
I was supported by a Gentlebirth practitioner and the Gentlebirth App in creating my beautiful birth experience. I highly recommend this for any mum to be. Click here to learn more about Gentlebirth
Truth #4 Never forget that you are in charge of your birth
If you want to have a drug free homebirth and you know all the risks and benefits? Go for it! But equally if you want an induction or elective c- section, and know all the risks and benefits? Do it!! Your birth is one of the most important experiences in your life that you will likely remember forever! Do your research. Make sure it is evidence based. And then make your decision.
Also be aware that you can also change your mind at any time before your baby’s birth
Truth #5 No amount of experience, degrees, or medical knowledge will ever trump your free will and intuition
If we want to let the body do what it’s designed to do, we need to follow the guidance. We need to listen to our bodies. We need to tune in and trust. This is how we know when to move, when to rest, when to breathe with a contraction and when to push and help your baby gently on his way. We don’t need someone telling us when we are fully dilated , when to lie down, when to push.
Did you know that when providers ask that you push on your back it’s because it’s easier for them to see what’s happening, not easier for you? You can decline a position change being suggested by your doctor or nurse. But to have the confidence to this you need to practice connecting with your intuition long before due day. This is a skill that make motherhood so much easier going forward. Click here to learn more about Mother’s Intuition
Truth #6 You can hire a doula to support you in birth and post partum
I believe an empowered birth experience comes from feeling in control of your experience and from receiving the right support. Through education and planning you can begin to feel in control. You can even plan for how you’ll respond if things don’t go according to plan.
You can do this on your own, or with your partner, but imagine having the support of someone who knows the power of a positive birth, who believes in our human bodies ability to birth, who can guide you in creating the right environment, in looking at research and that can help you make empowered choices. Someone who can speak up for you if you’re able.
A doula is a professional, non-medical companion trained in the needs of the family. They provide clients with continuous support during pregnancy, labour and birth, and the postpartum period. You can learn more about hiring a doula in Ireland here. I personally believe it could be the best money you’ve ever spent.
Finally I just want to say that if you are already a mum and did not experience an empowered birth, please don’t be hard on yourself. It took me to baby number 3 to connect with my power. We’re all learning on the job!
If you feel like you would benefit from healing your birth trauma I can help. Click here to learn more about the healing I offer
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Intuition is a natural ability in everyone. It’s a knowing that isn’t logical.
Most of us have been brought up to use our minds when making decisions. For many of us decisions were made for us throughout our childhood – what to eat, when to eat, how much to eat, when to sleep, how much to sleep etc We were literally taught to ignore our body’s communication system and hand the decision making to someone outside of ourselves. If you had expressed a 'feeling' about something that wasn’t logical, it would surely have been dismissed
Fast forward to becoming a parent. Suddenly we are faced with making decisions that will impact another little human being. We have an endless amount of decisions to make. Many of us wade through the advice of countless well-meaning friends and family members. Not to mention the mountain of conflicting advice on social media on every topic you can think of related to parenting.
But here’s the thing – we have infinite wisdom within ourselves and that wisdom is readily available to us anytime if we take a bit of time to tap into it.
The first step is recognizing that you have it and that it serves a purpose: to protect and guide you.
So how can we reconnect with this part of ourselves.
But how can we learn trust the information we think we are getting
If you’d like to learn more about balancing the chakras you’ll find a full section on the topic inside the Aligned Mama Membership Tell Me More
As you’re learning to tap into your intuition, it’s also incredibly helpful to keep a record of when you followed your intuition and the outcome. It helps increase your trust and confidence in your intuition and yourself. And when you’re having a bad day, which is inevitable, you’ll have these amazing reminders to flip back through.
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So what gets in the way of this healing?
Sometimes shock & trauma can get stuck in our energy system preventing flow and healing. Trapped or unresolved emotions can interrupt flow too. And because our thoughts can cause our energy field to either contract or expand, the pattern of our thoughts also has an effect on our flow. When we tune into our energy bodies with our intention, we can truly change our lives physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually.
Self-healing is a process through which you acknowledge the shock and trauma you’ve experienced in your life, witness emotions as they reveal themselves to you and become conscious of your thoughts and how they affect your vibration. It is the process integrating practices into your life that keep your energy expanded and flowing therefore allowing the healing process to run its course
Imagine if we approached self healing in the same way as we might approach a renovation project in our home
Are you ready to begin your Self Healing journey?
Step one in self healing and believing it’s possible. Journaling to create a clear vision of how you want to feel is a great start. Taking the time to pay attention to your health, happiness & wellbeing makes you become an active force in designing it.
Step Two is becoming really aware of how you feel You can do this through building awareness, tuning in to your frequency and using self guided meditation
If you'd like to learn these techniques you will love The Aligned Mama Membership. Click here to learn more
Guided Self-healing Meditation
Imagine that you are standing or sitting under a shower of healing energy
Imagine that this healing energy flows down through your head, down your neck down your arms and out your finger tips.
It also flows down your body, down your legs out your feet and out into the earth
With each breath in you invite in this healing energy. With each breath out you release old energy.
The new energy brings new life, vitality and healing.
It washes away any old cells, damaged cells, any cells that cannot be repaired. See the cells being carried away down your body, down your legs, and out into the earth
The new energy washes away any stuck energy, any stagnant energy, any negative energy, any energy that is not your own, washes it away down you legs out you feet and down into the earth.
You are controlling your own healing now. With each breath in you invite in healing. With each breath out you release anything that doesn’t serve you- down your body, down your legs and out into the earth
If you have a particular area in the body that requires healing you can direct the energy there. If you have hip pain direct the energy to your hip and see it wash away the pain. If it’s anxiety in your chest see the anxiety dissolve in the stream of healing energy and be carried away. If it’s an overactive mind see the healing energy carry away any negative repetitive thoughts that are not helpful.
Spend as long as you like in any areas of your body and know that you are powerful, your intention is everything and you have the collaboration of the healing energy of the Universe flowing through you
]]>Our soul is like a current of energy that flows from source just like a stream from a river. Being in the flow means going with the current of our soul’s energy. Just like a river, it has momentum as it flows. We humans have free will and so we have a choice to either think and feel and do things that go with this current OR we can choose to think and feel and do things that go against this current.
When we are going with the current we are living in alignment. When we go against the current are out of alignment
When we are going with the current we know it because of the way it feels. It feels like relief. It feels like expansion. This translates in our body like inspiration, excitement, passion, joy and appreciation. We are in the flow.
When we are going against the current we also know because of the way we feel. It will feel internally like resistance and tension. This translates in our body like feeling stuck, powerless, frustrated, anxious or depressed. It can literally feel like we are walking upstream against a very powerful current, which is exhausting.
When we are in the flow it means we are going with the flow. As a result we are carried along in the direction of everything our heart desires. We have the full support of the Universe behind us and we live a full, joyful life with ease.
Easy right?
The challenge of living in alignment comes from giving too much attention to our mind and not enough attention to our soul!
Here are 10 tips to help you live in Alignment:
Living in Alignment is a lifelong practice. It’s never done. But when you commit to living in alignment, over time, it becomes second nature
Finally some affirmations from Gabby Bernstein to keep you on track!
The problem is, that if we wish to live in alignment, we need to use our emotions for guidance - much like the Sat Nav in the car. Feelings of contraction and resistance are indicators that we have travelled off our path. In contrast, feelings of expansion, inspiration and joy are road marks that we are on the right path. But we can't know this if we don't tune to the truth of how we feel.
STEP 1: Breath (Connect with your spirit)
Breath in through your nose (smell the roses) for 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6
Breath out through your mouth (blow out the candles) for 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9
Repeat x3
STEP 2: Ground (Bring your energy home)
STEP 3: Ask (Be curious)
Place your hand on your heart
A blocked throat chakra is like having a cork in a bottle. When we speak our truth we release the cork and allow the genie (spirit) to be free
STEP 4: Self Compassion
Sometimes as we acknowledge how we feel the judging mind starts to speak up. Ask her to step back and invite in the compassionate voice to speak.
What would you like to hear?
What would you say to a child or a friend in the same situation?
If you have experienced Trauma, you may need the support of a professional who specialises holding space for you to experience big feelings safely.
If you'd like a tool to help you navigate from awareness to self compassion, I recommend learning about Tapping, also known as Emotional Freedom Technique. You can read my blog on Tapping (EFT) here.
The more we practice recognising the truth of how we feel the more we can live in alignment.
]]>Of course once I came to understand our energetic nature, I began to recognise the true power of the present moment.
What do I mean when I talk about being present in the moment?
If you’ve ever experienced meditation, yoga or tai chi or even threading a needle you will know l what I mean. To complete these tasks requires your full concentration. We can choose where our concentration or consciousness goes.
If I ask you now to focus on your big toe, can you feel it? Can you feel the sock or shoe against it. Can you feel the neighbouring toe? Now focus on your right eye? Can you feel it? What about your breath?
You see wherever your focus goes the energy flows. You can choose where to put your attention.
What is the benefit of focusing on the present moment?
Well consider for a moment where is your focus if it’s not in the present moment? It’s quite often in the past, reliving trauma or regret. Much of the time we are in the future trying to predict what will happen so we can feel in control. Either way we are in a state of anxiety.
What happens to our energy when we are in a state of anxiety?
Our energy system is made up of chakras, meridians and auric fields. The Auric fields emanate from inside our bodies and surround our bodies. They have many functions including receiving and broadcasting information between you and the outside world. When we experience fear or anxiety we pull the auric fields in close in an effort to protect ourselves. This can be felt in the physical body as contraction, tightness and pressure which can eventually manifest as pain, fatigue and illness.
When we come into the present moment for even a split second the auric fields expand again and we feel relief. If we can spend a longer period in the present moment we spend a longer time in expansion and there is an opportunity to heal.
My conclusion is if we wish to heal, from anything, making the decision to spend as much time as possible in the present moment is the best thing we can do.
Sounds easy right?
Here’s the challenge. When we are in the present moment we feel…everything. Every difficult emotion we have ever pushed away or ignored comes to the surface and sometimes the present moment can seem quite unpleasant. This is why we turn to our phones, or food or wine or just general busyness, unconsciously actively avoiding the present moment.
So what can we do?
I like to do yoga online and often my 4 year old decides he needs me just as I’m beginning! I have learnt that if I allow him to sit & watch he is happy enough but no amount of bribery or threats will give me peace. So I allow him there alongside me, but I do not give him my attention. Eventually he gets bored and moves along
In a similar way if we can learn to live alongside our difficult emotions we will find they move along. If we resist them they get louder
Sometimes this can feel overwhelming but once you’ve done this few times you will see that emotions come like waves. They rise and rise and rise and then they fall. When you have experienced this once you will realise that you will not drown, the wave will simply pass through.
If you find this especially difficult it is likely like you may benefit from professional help in regulating your nervous system and to hold the safe space for you to work through these difficult emotions
A perspective change
I always say in my clinic ‘If you’re seeing it you’re healing it’. The wonderful thing is about this is that when difficult emotions arise you may feel excited, instead of afraid. Instead of ‘Oh no here we go again!’ it’s ‘Oh yes, I’m seeing it so therefore I’m healing it.’
If you are open to healing and eager to release any past hurt or trauma that may be holding you back, every moment that you’re present is an opportunity for healing.
]]>Even though I’ve too much to do and not enough time………… I accept how I feel and I allow myself to be the way I am
Even though my to do list keeps getting longer, I’m ok and I am open to seeing this differently
Acknowledging how I really feel is a pretty new phenomenon for me. As someone who prides herself on being positive and generally optimistic, to take time to recognise a difficult emotion or a limiting belief was something I resisted for many years. Shake it off and look for the joy was my policy!
It’s not a bad policy to be fair. I prefer it to the ‘wallow in victim mode- poor me’ model! But either approach catches up with you eventually. Working as holistic therapist for over a decade now, I believe that trapped (unprocessed) emotions and the limiting beliefs that informs the critical voice in our heads, have a huge part to play in ill- health.
Good News! There is a middle ground. A process where we can acknowledge the truth of how we feel but not stay stuck there. This process is called Tapping or Emotional Freedom Technique.
WHAT IS TAPPING?
Tapping is a technique that combines energy healing and modern psychology . It involves tapping on acupuncture points along the meridians (energy pathways) while focusing on the difficult emotions or limiting belief you would like to address. It is gentle and effective for adults and children alike.
WHY TAP?
No matter what our circumstances, everybody from the Pope to Will Smith, experiences difficult emotions, such as sadness, shame and rage. But unprocessed emotions can have a significant impact on our emotional and physical well-being. They cause disruptions in the flow of energy through our body and can contribute to feelings of stress, overwhelm and anxiety.
When left unaddressed, these trapped emotions can also cause physical issues in our body. When tapping is used to clear these blocks in our energy meridians, difficult emotions can move through us, thus allowing energy to flow freely, which allows our bodies to heal effortlessly.
At a physiological level, many studies have shown that tapping is effective at regulating the nervous system and moving the body out of the stress response that many of us experience every day.
WHEN TO TAP
Whenever there’s stress, discomfort (physical, mental or emotional) or distress. The goal with tapping is not to stop feeling emotions. Tapping helps us to feel more fully and when we do that our emotions naturally progress
WHY I ENCOURAGE ALL MUMS TO LEARN TO TAP
Maternal overwhelm is normal and common. First of all looking after other humans is busy and never ending. We set such high standards for ourselves, we create impossible to do lists and ask ourselves to do it all with a smile! And then sometimes…we crack! We might loose the plot over the tiniest thing and then we can add guilt to the store of ignored emotions!
The bottom line us….if we can regulate our own nervous systems through tapping, we are protected from the stress of feeling overwhelmed. Our children are protected from our mother rage. We are better equipped to support our children when they meet their own difficult emotions
WHY I ENCOURAGE CHILDREN TO LEARN TO TAP
Many of us adults have developed techniques or taken on habits to help us avoid difficult emotions. We may avoid sitting still, eat with the tv on, scroll the phone between ads, eat for comfort, drink for comfort, get very busy with chores/work………we all have our own avoidance tactics. Do you know yours?
Imagine if our children learned to allow these emotions, as a part of being human. Imagine if they developed a practice of acknowledging how they really feel? I think it would make for a happier childhood and possibly save a whole load of issues in later life
WANT TO LEARN MORE?
In the ALIGNED MAMA PROGRAMME I have dedicated a complete module to teaching you step by step how to tap. I’ve also included ideas to help you tap with your children. For more information on this course click here
https://oonaghnaughton.com/pages/the-aligned-mama
OTHER USEFUL RESOURCES
Thanks to the wonder of YouTube to can begin tapping straight way simply by doing a quick search eg, tapping for sleep, tapping for pain and you simply copy what the practitioner is saying and doing
Here are some links to some of my favourites:
https://www.youtube.com/c/TappingforMums
https://www.youtube.com/c/tapwithbrad
https://www.youtube.com/c/TheTappingSolutionChannel
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I was a shell of the woman I once was. The anxiety and worry of minding my two very young boys on my own every day since circumstances required us to social distance and stay at home, had taken its toll.
After one day of healing, I felt lighter and more motivated. By the end of the healing sessions, I felt almost like the old me, capable, confident and motivated. And most importantly lighter, as my worries, anxiety and fear certainly lessened. And my boys are flying it! “
This lovely testimonial is from one grateful Mum following a treatment for herself and her boys. It describes so well my own experience back in 2010 when I first received Energy Healing. My girls were age 4 and 2 and I was drowning in overwhelm and exhaustion. Energy Healing for me and for my girls completely transformed my experience of motherhood. At the time of course I didn’t understand how….. but I do now.
In my clinic I use a combination of energy modalities, most notably Bio Energy Therapy and HiddenMind Therapy. To give you a little understand the impact of Energy Healing, I've described here 5 ways that Energy Healing can help Mums:
Many of us have experienced trauma giving birth. It doesn’t necessarily have to involve a life and death situation. Emotionally it can include feelings of vulnerability, helplessness, lack of control, not being heard. Physically we can experience trauma too, particularly if medical interventions are required. And energetically our energy flow can be interrupted, affecting our energy levels, mood, ability to heal and general wellness. Energy healing can clear the blockages caused by trauma for both Mum and child.
No none can prepare us for the responsibility and expectations associated with motherhood. Obviously you want to do everything in your power to support your child physically and emotionally and we often set unattainable standards for ourselves- look after baby and heal and prepare good food…..and clean house.. and maintain relationships with partner or friends or life before baby……etc etc .. oh and do it all perfectly with a smile on your face.
Everything on that to do list is draining your energy before you even get round to doing it. Energetic healing helps you cut energetic cords and reclaim your energy from anything that isn’t serving your health & wellbeing.
One of the most common responses I receive after sessions is that they are viewing their role as Mum differently. It becomes easier to see it as a blessing rather than a burden. This is partly because when we have more energy we don’t mind tackling the day to day jobs. But also because clearing 3rd eye chakra brings about a wider perspective, a big picture view. When we are in survival mode we have the blinkers on and we just keep going. Energy Healing takes off the blinkers!
Along with perspective shifts comes this realisation that we are not alone and that we are supported. I love hearing how Mums found out about me and the treatment I offer – it often shows numerous ‘coincidences’ which I call Spiritual Guidance. The idea that we are spiritual (energetic) beings having a human experience becomes more real the more in touch we are with the energetic aspect of ourselves.
For me a sense of empowerment was probably the greatest gift I received. To go from feeling helpless and hopeless, to learning that we are so much more than flesh and blood, and that we can heal from anything. To know that our natural state is wellness and with a little help we can return to balance- it takes the fear out of life’s challenges.
Taking it one step further, when a mum trains in Energy Healing herself, she has the tools to balance and restore her own energy and her child’s energy. And that is life changing
If you feel like you and your child may benefit from energy healing click here
https://oonaghnaughton.com/pages/bio-energy-children
If you’d to learn more about training in Energy Healing click this link
https://oonaghnaughton.com/pages/the-aligned-mama
Image credit : https://www.chloetrayhurn.com/
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I watched myself on video, demonstrating Bio Energy Techniques, and I burst into tears. Not a gentle trickle of tears but a tragic wail. To be honest, I surprised myself with this reaction. I knew I was self-conscious on the day Ailish (fabulous videographer) came to record, but we laughed a lot and she did a wonderful job of putting me at ease.
So where did this pain come from? It took me some time to explore. I mean the obvious things are my poor posture (which I’ve had as long as I can remember), the stone I’ve put on in the last 2 years, and the aging skin on my face (I am almost 48years old to be fair) but this was more than that. It felt like grief.
The Universe kindly put a stop to my editing and temporarily saved me from watching another video of myself with the arrival of covid in our house. I was quite unwell and I was gifted 2 weeks of no work to contemplate this lesson I knew had been presented to me.
I questioned whether the confident Oonagh that people meet at workshops and healing circles and on social media was real at all? Was she faking self-belief, self-confidence, joy?
I thought I had been down that road of self-acceptance in the years earlier when I first gave myself permission to be ‘seen’.
Breakthrough.....
It took sometime but I realised that while I was not faking, I was focusing only on my ‘strengths’ and quite simply ignoring the rest. I know my strengths lie in helping and healing and teaching. But I had chosen to completely ignore the aspects of myself that I don’t like.
Not a bad plan you might think… but the problem is, that we can never feel truly whole, until we look and acceptance all parts of ourselves
Can you relate?
I know I’m not alone in this. Many of us have trouble accepting ourselves fully. When it comes to our flaws and failures, we develop an overwhelming sense of judgment and rejection.
The critical voice in my head saw an old, crooked woman. The voice said “You should be drinking more water, you should be practicing yoga, you should say goodbye to chocolate biscuits!! You did this to yourself!” She was very angry with me!
The grief I experienced I believe was the rejection I felt. It was just as if my husband or my mum or someone who ‘should’ love me, rejected me. I thought I knew a thing or two about self-love but in the moment I rejected myself and I felt the pain of rejection.
So what to do?
In my case I want to believe that I am healthy and strong and fit and beautiful. But my perception on that day saw the opposite
Perception is the key word here and let me tell you why. In any moment we can look at a situation, or indeed ourselves, through the eyes of fear, or the eyes of love.
I sat myself down and I watched the video again and again and again. I choose to look at myself through the eyes of love. I chose to witness myself with compassion.
This isn’t a particularly easy exercise, so I pretended I was looking at a friend. What would I say to her? What do I love about her?
Suddenly it was easy .........and I was filled with love and compassion for the woman on the screen. I moved from being the woman desperately trying to love herself .....to the woman who loves.
Are you aware of the aspects of yourself that you reject? Would you like to feel more self acceptance? Here are some suggestions that have helped me
A few weeks ago the task of truly accepting myself, felt like a long uphill road. This simple shift in perception so beautifully summed up in the Jeff Fosters quote at the top of this page, has made me realise that really, self acceptance is a moment by moment choice. A choice to 'try to love myself' or a choice to 'simply be the self that loves'.
We can no longer ignore the fact that we are energetic beings as well as physical beings. Most of us are aware of how to physically, mentally and emotionally support our children but do you know how to offer support for their energy system (or your own!)
Of course the truth is, the energetic system is very much intertwined with all aspects of ourselves. When your child’s chakras are balanced they will experience balanced emotions, deep connections with others, clear communication, a guiding vision for their life and a connection to the higher power in their life. When a chakra is balanced, the energy flows freely through it and this is reflected in physical, emotional and mental health. If a chakra is blocked, physical, mental and emotional issues can arise.
Parents have a unique connection with their children and know them better than anyone. This awareness of the state of your child’s wellbeing and ability to take action is one of the greatest supports you can offer your child. You instinctively know if something isn’t right.
For parents, it can be extremely empowering to have some awareness and understanding of chakra imbalance in your child and some knowledge of how to help
In this next section I will share with you some common signs of chakra imbalance and some suggests of how you might help.
ROOT CHAKRA: SENSE OF SECURITY & BELONGING
Common Imbalances:
Often fearful and anxious
Suffers from frequent constipation or diarrhea
Under or overweight
Frequently complains of aches and pains in their legs and feet
Excessively collects or hoards things
How To Support Your Child
Promote embodiment – frequent touch, holding carrying, attending to physical needs
Focus on providing stability, safety and nourishment, and building trust
SACRAL CHAKRA: CREATIVITY, BELIEFS AROUND MONEY, SEXUALITY & POWER
Common Imbalances:
Excessive mood swings
Emotionally sensitive or insensitive
Frequent hip or lower back pain
Bladder issues
Abnormally inflexible
Transition to new activities is extremely upsetting
Often bored
How To Support Your Child
Offer safe opportunities to explore while balancing separation and attachment
Be responsive to expressions of emotion
Do your own healing work to prevent your child from picking up on your issues
SOLAR PLEXUS CHAKRA- PERSONAL POWER & SELF ESTEEM
Common Imbalances:
Aggressive to other children or family
Blames others for mistakes or choices,
Afraid to make mistakes
Avoids doing things they don’t feel good at
Very competitive
Suffers from digestive disorders, eating disorders or diabetes
How To Support Your Child
Promote self-esteem
Encourage independence
HEART CHAKRA- ABILITY TO LOVE THEMSELVES & OTHERS
Common Imbalances:
Slouchy posture or sunken chest
A people pleaser
Prefers to be alone
Difficulty fostering friendship
Often jealous of friends or siblings
Overly critical of themselves or others
How To Support Your Child
Pay attention to how you model relationships
Encourage and support peer relationships
Model self love & self care practices
THROAT CHAKRA - SELF EXPRESSION, SPEAKING YOUR TRUTH
Common Imbalances
Grinds teeth
Tells lots of lies
Suffers frequently from sore throat or strep throat
Stutters
Speaks with a weak voice or an excessively loud voice
Talks too much at inappropriate times
Has difficulty expressing themselves or is excessively shy
How To Support Your Child
Support communication.
Encourage your child to expand their horizons and ways of looking at life.
Encourage your child to ask questions and take time to answer them
THIRD EYE CHAKRA- INTUITION, SENSE OF PURPOSE & DIRECTION IN LIFE
Common Imbalances:
Overactive imagination or lack of imagination
Frequent nightmares
Poor vision or other eye issues,
Frequently headaches
Has difficulty concentrating
Has a poor memory
How To Support Your Child
Support their expression of individuality
Support expression of independence (within reasonable boundaries)
Encourage your child to make their own decisions wherever possible
CROWN CHAKRA- CONNECTION TO THE DIVINE
Common Imbalances:
Lives too much in their head
Excessive attachment to objects or people
Closed minded
Easily confused
Apathetic and lacks curiosity and never questions others’ points of view
How To Support Your Child
Support their expression of individuality
Support expression of independence (within reasonable boundaries)
Encourage your child to make their own decisions wherever possible
SOME OTHER WAYS YOU CAN SUPPORT YOUR CHILD’S ENERGETIC BALANCE
BIO-ENERGY HEALING
Bio Energy healing is possibly the most non invasive energy modalities. It involves moving your hands in front of your child’s chakra’s. Your hands act like magnets to the trapped or stagnant energy, clearing blockages and allowing the energy to flow freely again.
PENDULUM DOWSING
Use a pendulum to identify the source of your child’s blockages allows you to release with the power of your intention. This is also a useful for measuring the function of the chakras and identifying which chakra needs a little help.
TAPPING (EFT)
Emotional Freedom uses tapping on the acupuncture points in the body to clear trapped energy. The tapping is combined with speaking about the emotional issue being experienced. Using tapping helps prevent energy blockages in the chakras which is why it’s a wonderful skill to teach your child early in life
ESSENTIAL OILS
Essential oils can used in the diffusers or they can be applied directly to the chakra area in the body. Essential oils combined with affirmations can be a very powerful tool in balancing the chakras
Root Chakra: Vetiver (Oil of Grounding & Centering) I am safe
Sacral Chakra: Wild Orange (Oil of Abundance) I am abundant
Solar Plexus Chakra: Bergamot (Oil of Self-Acceptance) I am wonderful
Throat Chakra: Lavender (Oil of Communication) I speak my truth
Heart Chakra: Rose (Oil of Divine Love) I am loving and I am loved
Third Eye Chakra: Clary Sage (Oil of Clarity) I see clearly
Crown Chakra: Frankincense (Oil of Truth) I am supported
You may wish to book your child in for some Energy Healing Sessions or indeed you may wish, like myself, to be trained in using theses modalities with your family..
If you feel drawn to learn more I invite you to join me on THE ALIGNED MAMA MEMBERSHIP
You can click here for further details
]]>Our Energetic Anatomy is equally complicated and sophisticated and for the most part takes care of itself. But a little knowledge is really helpful in supporting this system to do its work.
(If you want to learn a little more about your Energetic Anatomy and how it functions you can do so by accessing the FREE Ebook and Video Training. CLICK HERE)
Even if you are not familiar with Energetic Anatomy a simple awareness of its existence, a decision to tune in, and an awareness of when you’re out of alignment, can have huge impact on your health &wellbeing.
Here are 3 Empowering Habits to support your Energetic Anatomy to get you started:
Surround yourself with people, social media, tv, podcasts, books that make you feel good (cause you to expand). Engage in activities you enjoy e.g. dancing, gardening, hiking, knitting …whatever floats your boat!
Disconnect from people, social media, tv, podcasts, books and activities that make you feel bad (cause you to contract)
Activity: Write an inventory of how you spend your time/energy. Then consider which items on your list raise your vibration and which lower your vibration. Which energise you, which drain you. Then make better choices
Our vibration. always tunes itself to the dominant frequency around it. This is why evening visiting someone in hospital is enough to make you feel ill and equally why you reach cloud nine at a music concert. Nature is at the frequency of balance and being in nature will bring us into balance
Activity: Go outside. Look at the sky. Observe any nature around you. Become aware of where your feel meet the earth. Talk to Mother Earth- she is there to support you.
Usually we can identify the moment we went from feeling balanced to blah. Could be something someone said, could be a social media post, could be a physical shock, could be a fright of some kind. It usually manifests as feeling unnaturally drained or over emotional).
You could clap your hands and say ‘ I choose to disconnect from _________ and reclaim my energy now’
Sometimes our energy is interrupted by triggering old wounds. If you notice a pattern here, it may be time to revisit old wounds with a counsellor or therapist, or even by yourself through journaling. If you’re seeing it you’re healing it, is a favourite mantra of mine.
To conclude...
You do not need huge knowledge or even understanding of the Energetic Anatomy to make a difference, although I find it incredibly interesting!
The above are just 3 habits you can build into your daily life for energetic alignment, there are 7 MORE in my FREE EBOOK which details 10 Empowered Habits for Energetic Alignment.
CLICK HERE FOR THE FREE DOWNLOAD
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Now there’s a kick up the bum if I ever needed one! Do we need a terminal diagnosis to achieve this shift in perception? Don’t we all have a terminal diagnosis actually….. because the truth is none of us can guarantee we will be here tomorrow?
This got me thinking about my own mission. I always say I want to help Mums to get in alignment and stay in alignment ( most of the time!). In fact I’ve called my next project the Aligned Mama Programme but what does that mean?
Let me be clear. You can be an Aligned Mama and still:
Need a break
Get annoyed
Loose your temper
Experience sadness, guilt, grief, fear, doubt….and the rest
But here’s the difference
The Aligned Mama is the observer of her experience. She knows she is on earth to experience the full spectrum of experiences and emotions and most importantly she realises that the same is true for her children
The Aligned mama knows that to experience joy she must know sadness, to experience trust she must know doubt, to experience love she must know grief, to fully experience life, she must face death.
She is aware that our time here is limited and that all could change in a moment, so she soaks up her experiences, the good the bad and the ugly.
I got a taste of that with my little boy Johnny. He has a heart condition and when in the womb the prognosis was not good. The wonderful positive affect of this situation was that when we brought him home, I never once got upset about being tired or sore. I was so incredibly grateful to hear his cries for milk in the night, so incredibly grateful to see him grow strong and cheeky and wreck my house and sometimes wreck my head, but everyday I know it could have gone differently.
So the Aligned Mama maybe doesn’t have a perfect house, or a perfect figure. She may not always have organic home cooked meals or do stimulating educational activities with kids. She may occasionally loose her temper or even cry.
But the Aligned Mama accepts that there nothing is wrong with her…… or her children. She doesn’t join in the drama. She is aware and realises in every given moment that she has a choice how to perceive the situation and how to react. And considering death is one of the quickest ways to remind us what is important.
My dear friend died peacefully at home with her family around her, on Sunday 28th November 2021. RIP Beautiful Lady.
The Aligned Mama Programme is an Energy Healing Training Course for Mums. But it is much more than that. It is my hope I can help mums to surf the up & down waves of life, without drowning, with an open heart and a genuine love of motherhood and life. (Details coming soon!)
]]>As you change your vibrational frequency through self-love practices, the type of people and opportunities you attract into your experience will hold the new frequency. And the deeper you go into self-love you will find yourself naturally letting go of that which no longer serves your growth & well-being.
Loving yourself is a mind shift for many of us. We are so used to the inner critic constantly telling us where we are going wrong. Loving yourself requires ignoring that inner critic and introducing daily practices that gradually become life changing habits
Here are my top 8 daily habits for Self-Love & how they affect your frequency
Are you ready to start bringing more self love practices into your life? Click here for 20 Self Love Journal Prompts to get you started!
Why not start prioritising yourself today by joining THE SOOTHING SESSIONS Group Energy Healing for Mums. Click here to learn more
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In my experience there are 4 main truths that stand out for me as a holistic mama. See if you agree!
When we are out of alignment we have no energy, we feel tired all the time. Everything is a struggle. Everything is irritating. We fulfil our parenting obligations with resentment.
Conversely when we in alignment we have more energy. We can think clearly, see solutions and find it easy to be more patient & kind. We experience more joy & ease.
With this knowledge surely it makes sense then to prioritise our own alignment! This looks different for everyone but these are my favourite ways to stay in alignment
Looking at my child through an energetic lens completely transformed my interpretation of what was going on. Before learning this, I might have said My child is naughty, cheeky, hard work, spoilt, demanding etc…..
I now know that these are merely symptoms of energetic misalignment, most likely caused by physical or emotional shock. These are the some of the ways I support my children to help them stay in alignment
A sick child is not a sign of parenting failure- it's normal! When we can support our children to fight infection themselves, their immune system will be even stronger. Changing your perspective on sickness can really help alleviate the stress around it. For Example:
Learning how to use natural solutions such as essential oils and energy healing was one of the best things I’ve ever done and I whole heartedly encourage all mothers to do the same. I remember when my girls were small, if they were sick, it honestly felt like the end of the world to me. I felt helpless, useless and afraid.
I now view illness as just another aspect of life that comes and goes. But nobody wants to see their child suffering so being able to relieve discomfort and speed up the healing process is a massive gift in my eyes
My tips for supporting your child through illness are:
Simple strategies that work.
The holistic mama knows that if we can reduce the stress levels, we can stay as healthy as possible. Awareness is everything and having tools to move our nervous systems out of stress response, can hugely support our goal of a happy health aligned home.
There are many ways to address stress but here are my favourites:
Do you want to know the best thing about being a holistic mama? Your children will see themselves through this lens. Isn't that wonderful? And as they see you look after your own alignment, following your joy and using natures gifts as medicine, they will do the same going forward in life. That feels good to me!
]]>In 2010 when my baby was 4 years old I learned about energy healing and my experience of motherhood changed completely.
Here is what I learned:
Birth Shock
You get the picture. A mum starting motherhood out of alignment may be on for an uphill battle.
Energetic Cords
We are all familiar with the umbilical cords but I was not aware that there are energetic cords also
In my case I felt everything my baby went through – when she was distressed I was distressed and so I longed to escape. This unhealthy energetic bond explained my daughter’s anger too as she longed to escape from me and gain her independence. For other Mums it can mean finding separation from each other unbearable, with either Mum or child very clingy and needy
Transformation
When I received Energy healing I experienced a huge transformation in my mood, my energy and most importantly in my connection to my children. I felt strong and grateful and at last I could understand why other Mums loved being Mums! I witnessed a transformation in my children too, especially my first baby. She was so much more relaxed and affectionate and now at the age of almost 16 we really get on so well. I can’t imagine where we’d be had we not been introduced to the world of Energy Healing.
The Good News
The good news is that it is never too late to balance energy and cords. My own experience has led me to being in the wonderful position of helping Mums and child reclaim and rebalance their energy and the results can be incredible.
If you feel you or your child would benefit from Energy Healing please click here and complete the contact form to register for a free 15 minute consultation to see if I can help.
All my treatments are from a distance and you can read details here.
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In comes your better half, beaming from ear to ear. You have just won the lotto!! Oh wow – you are thrilled, you are joyful and oh yes you are bursting with energy!!
How did that happen?
Well I can tell you exactly what happened……..you opened your heart centre!
The heart centre is the gateway to our connection to the universe (and unlimited energy)
It operates like a door. When bad things happen we often close the door as a way of protecting ourselves. However when we close the door two things happen
When good things happen our heart centre door opens wide. We release trapped emotions and the energy flows
Through the course of any day we open and close our heart centre door many times unconsciously. (If we have experienced trauma it may remain closed more of the time and energy healing can really help with this)
Follow these steps to access that unlimited energy supply and live a life where you are energised, motivated & joyful
STEP ONE: NOTICE WHEN YOUR HEART CENTRE IS OPEN AND CLOSED
So how can you tell if your heart is open or closed? Try this short exercise
Did you notice the power of your thoughts there?
STEP TWO: CHOOSE ACTIVITIES & THOUGHTS THAT OPEN YOUR HEART CENTRE
If you wish to have more energy choose activities and thoughts that open your heart centre. Avoid activities and thoughts that close your heart centre.
As with most things awareness is everything
Try this simple journaling exercise and let your feelings navigate your path
Makes changes to your life if need be.
If that feels impossible, make changes to how you perceive your life i.e. choose your thoughts.
Download 30 Prompts to Open Your Heart Centre here
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